Experiencing A Gender Identity Crisis As An Adult? Why This Is Normal
Gender identity and nonconformity have become hot topics in recent years. Unfortunately, they’ve also become highly politicized, causing confusion and doubt to creep into the minds of some people who might be struggling with their identities.
The conversation around gender identity tends to focus on younger people. But, you can absolutely experience a gender identity crisis as an adult. Gender identity is something that’s fluid and can move and shift throughout your life.
So, if you’re experiencing this change for the first time, no matter your age, don’t feel like it isn’t normal. Instead, figure out the best way to navigate it.
What Does a Gender Identity Crisis Look Like?
It’s important not to dismiss your feelings or what you’re going through. Understanding the actual signs of a gender identity crisis as an adult can help. While these signs can be slightly different for everyone, some of the most common include:
A deep desire to be a different gender
Wanting to wear clothes of a different gender
Wanting others to treat you as a different gender
You might also feel the need to get rid of any “sexual” characteristics you might possess or anything that associates you with being a specific gender. Some people also deal with feelings and convictions about finding the same gender attractive, especially if you’ve never experienced those feelings before.
Why Does It Occur?
A gender identity crisis can happen at any age for a variety of reasons, but it’s often something that’s been repressed since childhood, which is why you might feel confused or even shocked to be experiencing it now.
If you think you’re experiencing a gender identity crisis, one of the best things you can do is reach out for professional help. You might even benefit from an official diagnosis of gender dysphoria so you can get the support you deserve.
Confronting Your Gender Identity Crisis
Speaking of getting support, don’t be intimidated by the idea of a diagnosis. It’s a starting point that will help you make more sense of what you’re experiencing. More importantly, it will give you a path forward.
When you learn to accept what you’re going through, you can start taking active steps to cope. Start by showing yourself compassion and kindness. If a close friend or family member came to you dealing with a gender identity crisis, how would you treat them? Don’t love yourself any less.
It’s also important to practice self-care. Prioritize mental and physical wellness every day as you get used to feeling good about your body and understanding it. If you identify as a different gender, self-care might include finding ways to affirm your identity. That could include anything from wearing different clothes to things like breast binding.
Seeking Support
You can’t (and shouldn’t) bear the weight of a gender identity crisis on your own. Once you’ve accepted what you’re going through, lean on your support system. Talk to your friends and family when you feel ready and safe.
If you feel like the people in your life won’t support you, reach out to allies. Join groups — both online and in-person — who will help you through this chapter.
Most importantly, consider therapy — not because anything is wrong with you, but because you deserve to feel supported, understood, and heard. This can be a difficult and confusing time of life. Working with a therapist can help you make sense of these changes and feelings, so you can become confident in who you really are and live your truth to the fullest.
If you feel like you’re experiencing a gender identity crisis as an adult, rest assured you’re not alone. Feel free to contact me to set up an appointment for LGBTQ+ counseling, and know that you are valued.
Learn more about LGBTQ+ Therapy.
